My entire life has led up to this moment...

Hi,
How are you today?

Popping into your inbox to remind you of something very important.

You have a choice:
stay the same,
do it the way they tell you to,
or carve your own path.

You are NOT powerless, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

You are powerful beyond belief.

THIS is the basis of Redefining Sobriety.

It is more than “just another program.”

It is a movement.

It is a new path, one you haven’t been offered before.

One that has been a lifetime in the making.

Did you know that I have 20 years of experience leading up to this?
Yes you read that right. 20 YEARS!

I started as a peer volunteer when I was 15 years old. I was one of the first rural youth trained by YouthCO AIDS Society, Canada’s only youth-led HIV/AIDS awareness and education organization.

That led to a lot of firsts:

I was one of the first youth facilitators hired by a government initiative to travel around the project and do workshops on topics such as celebrating diversity, preventing sexual violence and bullying, at age 17.

I was one of the youngest enrolled in my Child and Youth Care Counselling program (my first diploma). In fact, I had a wait a year because they wouldn’t let me enroll until I was 18.

I was the first Hepatitis C and harm reduction coordinator for YouthCO at age 19.

I created the first youth-led project for youth actively using methamphetamines, at age 21.

I became Vancouver’s first Youth Advocate Mentor, reporting directly to City Hall on behalf of Children and Youth, at age 22.

I co-founded Youth RISE, the first and only global youth-led harm reduction network, at age 24.

This work transformed into several other “firsts” including developing the first regional drug policy reform strategy in SouthEast Asia and Cambodia’s first Drug Strategy for Family Health International.

That was career that you sometimes hear me reference. Yes, the one that led to extreme burnout. But that wasn’t my career’s fault. I grew up in this work from a very young age. I didn’t know how to take care of myself or cope with the huge emotional burden I shouldered by doing this kind of work.

For awhile, I stopped talking about it. It’s as if I was born again 6 years ago, when I left Cambodia and moved to Mexico. And again 4 years ago when I redefined my relationship to alcohol once and for all. I spend a lot of time referencing my recent history, however it’s my 20+ years of work experience that actually lays the foundation of unique approach I take with my work.

All of this work had several key common themes:

  • Being “client” focused, and asking the group most affected what solutions would work best for THEM

  • Outside of the box and nonlinear

  • Explicitly empowering, non-judgement and anti-oppressive

  • Solutions focused - looking at where the gaps in current services are, and creating new ones

  • All about restoring dignity and power

  • All about celebrating uniqueness and aliveness

So you see, in a way, I’ve always done this.

My work is so intuitive because it has lived inside of me for so long.

The specific focus around alcohol and holistic healing was added because of my own journey.

That’s what Redefining Sobriety is all about.

 It’s the umbrella for everything I’ve learned and created and implemented for the past 20+ years.

That’s why it would mean so much for you to join me in the very first Redefining Sobriety Program.
It’s 9 weeks, but you get a LIFETIME of participation.

That’s right - this program will launch again in the new year, at a much higher price point, but you get to join again, for free. And the next time it launches, and the next until either you don’t need it anymore or I stop doing it.

We start on October 30.
No sales page, no frills, no promo right now (all that’s coming in the new year).
This invitation is going out to my current list only and I want to keep the first group intimate.

You will have access to EVERYTHING I KNOW and have created so far.

This will be the playground for testing Redefining Sobriety.
Yes, it will be work, we will go deep, but it will also be a lot of FUN!

There will be LIVE weekly calls and worksheets and Facebook support.

All you need to do is submit your payment of $227 here. 

If you’ve worked with me before, either privately or in a group, you can receive your lifetime membership for 50%!!! One-time payment of $113.

There are only 3 spots left for this lifetime offer.

Will you join us?

xoxo

by Caitlin Padgett

Is this for you?

Hi,

How are you this week?

Have you ever saw someone taking a different approach - something you yourself would never do-  and scratched your head thinking, what on earth, how does that work, WHY?

Like someone who is into extreme sports, or a particular diet, or religion.

They might be someone you really love or admire or respect, yet you can’t imagine spending your time or focus doing that they chose to do.

While I was studying at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition, we learned about the concept of bio-individuality, which is the now scientifically proven theory that no one diet or nutritional approach works for everyone.

So how did it come to be that there is only one prescribed approach to problems with alcohol?

Before 1935, there was very little in the way of support or study of both the brain and effective addictions treatment. When Alcoholics Anonymous was established that year, it filled a void. The seemingly simply approach it offered - lifelong abstinence from alcohol - combined with a prescribed step-by-step program, quickly became the go-to approach. However, due to the tenets of anonymity and lack of records kept by the amorphous groups, its efficacy has never been properly studied.

Yet AA and the offshoot 12 step programs who claim that one drink might as well equal 100 and peg relapse as a personal failure are the norm. The proliferation of these community-based groups has absolved governments of having to fund and provide evidence-based treatment options.

There is no denying this approach has worked for some who have dedicated their lives to it (including close friends and family members of mine). I am not challenging that it can work for those who work it (one of the AA slogans).

However, according to a study by the Centre for Disease Control and Prevention, nine out of 10 heavy drinkers are NOT dependent on alcohol and, with the help of a medical professional’s brief intervention, can change unhealthy drinking habits.

Don’t you think it’s high time for other approaches that honour our bio-individuality, our unique histories, and desires for the future, our different personalities, our intuition?

Which is why I am introducing an alternative….

Drumroll please...

Let me present you with: Redefining Sobriety!

 Redefining Sobriety is for you if:

  • You resist having someone tell you it has to be done a certain way

  • You’ve heard about or tried programs that require life-long abstinence and know intuitively that it’s not for you

  • You want to self-define what feels like a “problem,” or not

  • You’d rather not be labelled (you feel they are restrictive and disempowering)

  • You’re interested in holistic approaches that include mind, body and spirit

  • You know that you are NOT powerless

  • You are so ready to start showing up fully, for yourself and life (instead of staying stuck in the same cycle of self-disappointment)

  • You long for a space where you can share your full self, your ups and downs, without ever being judged

  • You want to create your own path to healing, and all you need is some accountability, support, and new tools and strategies

  • You are ready to look in the mirror and feel fully proud of the person looking back at you

During this 9 week beta program, I will share the three pillars of Redefining Sobriety:

  1. Your Unique Plan (future writing, getting clear on your vision, your full life circle, the new “AA” aka your personalized alcohol agreement, strategies tailored uniquely to you)

  2. Your Empowered Ownership (mindset, heartset, confidence, clarity and accountability)

  3. Your Exquisite Life (making a life so incredible that a drink feels like an afterthought, not the main event)

This is not a band-aid or a quick fix.
It is not a prescription, or a one-size fits all model.

You CREATE your vision, you OWN your story, you DECIDE your path.

If you have never worked with me before, join now and receive a LIFETIME membership (yes, you participate in this first beta round AND EVERY TIME THE PROGRAM LAUNCHES AGAIN, until either I stop doing it or you stop needing it ;) for only $227. Just click here.

If you have been a private client, purchased the Drink Less Be More Masterclass, or are a current Be More member, you can join now and receive a LIFETIME membership for 50% off, that’s $113. Whaaaaat? I know. But I love you and appreciate everything we’ve done together. And I would love nothing more than for you to join me in this next phase of the journey. Just click here. 

There are very limited spots available in this super special beta group (with the lifetime membership bonus).

Six are already spoken for - is one of the remaining spots yours?

xoxo

by Caitlin Padgett

I really want you to know

I want you to know…

You are not broken.

You are not a label.

You are not powerless.

You don’t have to fit into a box.

You get to decide.

You pick your path.

You are in control.

You are free.

If you’ve been told “there is only one way” - and yet your intuition told you otherwise.

If you’ve tried “their way” but it didn’t feel right.

If you are ready to live your “best yes” in the most authentically aligned way possible.

Redefining Sobriety is for you.

This is my life’s work. I know this with absolutely certainty and I will tell you why in my next email.

For now, I want you to know what whatever you are dreaming for yourself IS possible.

During this 9 week program, I will take you through a step by step process based on the 3 pillars of Redefining Sobriety:

  • Creating Your Unique Plan (all of my best strategies, uniquely tailored to you)

  • Developing Ownership Over Your Choices (mindset, heartset, confidence, clarity and accountability)

  • Living an Exquisite Life (making a life so incredible that a drink feels like an afterthought, not the main event... and yes, you are "allowed" to drink, if you want to!)

Will you join me in creating a revolution?

I believe that the “sober recovery industry” needs some new alternatives.

I am convinced with every cell in my body and all my soul that Redefining Sobriety can provide a powerful choice, in particular for women who have had enough with feeling powerless.

I’m inviting YOU to be a co-creator in the movement.

If you have never worked with me before, join now and receive a LIFETIME membership (yes, you participate in this first beta round AND EVERY TIME THE PROGRAM LAUNCHES AGAIN, until either I stop doing it or you stop needing it ;) for only $227. Just click here.

If you have been a private client, purchased the Drink Less Be More Masterclass, or are a current Be More member, you can join now and receive a LIFETIME membership for 50% off, that’s $113. Whaaaaat? I know. But I love you and appreciate everything we’ve done together. And I would love nothing more than for you to join me on this next phase of the journey. Just click here.

There is no website or sales page yet, that’s coming in the New Year.

I will be sending more info during the next week and am happy to answer any questions you have (just send me a message).

I’m just so thrilled to get started and want us to be together all the way until the holidays.

First module released the Week of October 30th. There will be weekly calls taking you all the way until Christmas.

Finish this year strong and supported.

I have limited spots available in this beta group (aka most intimate and amazing community) so please don’t delay.

Click here for $227.

If you’ve worked with me before or you are currently enrolled, click here for $113.

Remember, this is a lifetime membership to all Redefining Sobriety group programs!!!

Will you join us?

xoxo

by Caitlin Padgett

stop living in the past - healing happens in the present

Hello,

"Focusing on the past keeps us stuck exactly where we are in the present. In order for real healing to happen in the present, we must accept and connect to the past without letting it define us."

Every month we invite a different expert to share their knowledge with our Be More Membership group.

This month's guest expert was Marine Selenée, a psychologist and family constellations practitioner whom I met last time I was in NYC.

The call was so packed with useful insights that I took pages of notes!

Marine reminded us that it was our inner child who suffered, not us as adults, yet when we don't recognize the experience of the inner child, we unconsciously react as she would. When we can help our inner child feel at peace and soothed, we become able to control our reactions as adults instead of as a wounded child desperately looking for love (and doing whatever she can do avoid the loss of it).

Marine suggested a daily practice of 5 minutes spent writing or talking to your inner child to reminder her that she is love and appreciated for everything she did to get you to where you are today. Thank you and I've got this from here on in.

I asked my mom to send me pictures of myself at the age where I believe I really started to fear the loss of love and experience the effects of abandonment by my father. I've been looking at this picture and sending love to this innocent girl who so desperately wanted to be "enough" so that her father would stick around and really want to know her (not just her cute exterior). I've been telling her that I understand why for so many years after she kept resorting to physical attention as a substitute for self-love, and why she sought out codependent relationships from fear of being left.

We also learned of a powerful exercise in which we can give the family dynamics back to our ancestors. By starting a letter to our ancestors with the theme of "Today I give it back to you..." means you are acknowledging and affirming that family patterns did not start with your, but they can end with you.

There were so many more amazing and insightful topics we covered in terms of family systems and how to navigate the complex relationships we have within our families.

If you'd like to learn more about Marine and her work, please visit her website. She has an upcoming course all about family constellations and a great book called The Movement, which I am gifting to all of our current Be More Be Members.

If YOU would like to hear the entire replay for of her call with us, as well as the other guest expert calls AND monthly coaching call, join the Be More Membership for only $47/month. If you join this week, I'll send you a copy of Marine's book too! More info on how to join below.

xoxo

by Caitlin Padgett

I haven't been drunk 4 YEARS!?! (what do YOU want to know?!)

 

Hello ,

September 18th will mark the last day I got drunk.

I woke up the next morning thinking "never again" and I meant it.

Even though I'd said this to myself before, countless times, this time something shifted deep inside of me. Never again (up until now anyway) stuck.

No more blackouts.
No more letting myself down.
No more days wasted hungover.
No more soul-crushing self-criticism and shame.
No more numbing. No more hiding.
No more taking the easy way out (aka the bandaid solution that allows the wounds underneath to continue to fester)
No more losing my grip on reality.
No more straying from my best yes in any given situation.
No more ignoring my intuition.
No more denying my healthiest self. No more abusing my body and mind.
No more feeling like alcohol controlled me instead of the other way around.
No more wondering if moderation was possible for me or just a pipe dream (believe me, I've had more than enough people tell me that once you have a problem with alcohol, it's impossible to moderate).
I could go on and on. But you get the point.

If you'd like to say "no more" to the damaging effects of alcohol in your life, you know that I'm here to support you in any way I can.

That's why I'm recording a very special 4 year not-drunk-iversary video for you.

I'd love to answer your questions. If there is anything you'd like to know about my 4-year journey, I'd love to know.

It takes a lot of courage to step into the unknown.

I didn't have many role models when I started out, and still don't. To be honest, it took me a few years to really truly feel confident in what my intuition was telling me - that it IS possible to control your relationship to alcohol without cutting out alcohol completely (if you don't want to).

So tell me, is there anything you worry about? Feel confused or doubtful about? Any nagging curiosity? As we used to say in the sexual health workshops I facilitate 20+ years ago (!!) - there are no stupid questions, no questions too big or too small.

I can't wait to hear from you.

(the video will be sent Friday, so don't delay!)

xoxo

by Caitlin Padgett

Flashback Friday and special invitation for September

Hello and welcome to September!

Since landing in Canada just over 3 weeks ago, I’ve experienced a series of flashbacks that have brought perspective to just how far I’ve come in this journey of self-re-discovery and healing.

Flashback to Trashy Tuesdays (7 years ago) when it was a source of pride to get drunk mid-week.

I somehow felt more at home with the misfits who were also out drinking on a Tuesday night. Looking back, the biggest common denominator we shared was a need to escape reality for on a weeknight using alcohol. We were at the local bar sucking back two-dollar highballs like there was no tomorrow. When tomorrow did of course arrive replete with a pounding headache and a stomach heavy with remorse, hump day was even more of a mountain to climb. This flashback hit me as I was dancing at the same bar at the unofficial after-party for our town’s Pride celebrations. I was sober and having a blast dancing in the middle of 6 foot tall drag queens and a medley of the town’s queer folk and allies, without a care of what anymore “else” (ie the bar’s very straight-seeming regular clientele) thought.

Flashback to 5 years ago when I heard the following words. “I need naloxone!”

The nurse shouted as he ran down the hall. “Naloxone? Is my mom having an overdose?” I had come back to Canada to support my mom during the recovery of a fairly routine hip surgery. I had called the nurse as my mom’s temperature had dropped and she seemed to be shaking uncontrollably and the became unresponsive. I knew enough about opiates to know this looked like an overdose and that Naloxone was an opiate-blocker given to those experiencing an overdose. Somehow, my mother’s IV had allowed too much morphine to be administered. I’m really good in crisis, and the nurse used me as his aid as he stabilized her condition. Yet I couldn’t emotionally process seeing my mom almost die (I don't know if she actually could have but that's what it felt like). That night I took the Seabus into the city for a get-together at a friend’s house, which turned into going to a dive bar for more drinks, which turned into showing up at a sketchy afterparty. I made it back to another friend’s house only because that friend had a daughter who was going to need to be up in the morning and she remembered to “be responsible” at 4am. I overslept to see messages on my phone from the original friend I was supposed to spend the night with, worried because I never showed up at her house, and from my sister because I was late arriving back to the hospital to help discharge my mom. We missed a ferry back to our hometown and I felt sick with shame for letting my family down. All of this came flooding back to me as we drove around the neighbourhood and my mom pointed out the hospital where she had her surgery.

Flashback to my hometown's Blackberry Street Festival 4 years ago.

I’d been working at my friend’s restaurant and drinking as much tequila as I could sneak in between busily serving beers and margaritas under a tent barely protecting us from the pouring down rain. My cousin and his partner were visiting, and they bravely faced the elements to come have a beer with my mom and keep me company for a bit while I worked. They were only staying for the weekend. Instead of going home to my mom’s after my shift was over, I went to the local bar (yep, same one that I frequented for trashy Tuesdays) to chase down someone I’d had my eye on. He was super drunk and had a coworker of mine hanging all over him. Me, with everything to prove, needed to feel like the chosen one and charmed him accordingly. We ended up stumbling up the hill to his sister’s house (none of us was fit to drive) and continuing the party aka drinking more. We eventually collided and experienced each other in ways that I’m sure neither of us quite remembered the next day. Waking up, still drunk feeling, and realizing I was in my friend’s daughter’s room and all I wanted was to get out of there. Instead, we went to A&W and I ate something that only enhanced my feeling of wanting to vomit. I got dropped off at my mom’s car, drove home slowly, head-swimming and put on a brave face as I sat down shame-filled at the table where my cousins were having a delicious homemade lunch with my mom. I was a few months into my Holistic Health Coach training program and felt, yet again, that I was living a double life. This flashback return as those same cousins came to Blackberry fest again this year. Instead of going out after the street festival, I couldn’t be happier to crawl into bed next to Luna and get up early to take our kids to the farmer’s market. That night I did go to a party and saw the same friend whose house I had said at 4 years ago (and whose little brother I had hooked up with). I danced without needing attention from anyone and was gratefully the designated driver, dropping off a few friends and waking up a little tired but totally clear the next day and able to enjoy time with family.

There are many more flashbacks but these are a few of the most powerful.

It is with immense relief that I can experience these flashbacks without feeling paralyzed by shame or remorse as I did in the past.

Instead I feel gratitude and compassion for that part of me.

That woman who still didn’t understand or love herself enough to choose differently… who often didn’t even know she had a choice.

I also recognize that I can feel this level of compassion and gratitude because I’ve come so far and have done so much work on myself, so much healing, so much forgiving.

I’m at a now safe distance and have no fear of slipping back to that version of me.

You might not be quite there yet. I get that. It took me awhile too.

That’s why it’s so important to me to keep offering the tools and support to help along the way.

September has always been a month that has brought the promise of change for me.

I love the energy shift as we head into the last quarter of the year.

This year I’m offering a 21-day “September Reset” for anyone feeling that they are ready to powerfully shift into the new season. I’ll be sharing all of my best tools and strategies - for free!

We start September 8th and you can sign up here.

Now I'm signing off to enjoy my last weekend in Canada, at the Sunshine Music Fest, before kicking back into gear and getting ready to reset next week.

I hope you have a fabulous weekend of "being present" and soaking it all in, and hope you will consider joining the reset too.

xoxo

by Caitlin Padgett

[Be More You Video 8 of 8] Seeking support

 

Hello,

I hope this blog posts finds you exceptionally well at the end of this week. Can you believe we're already halfway through August? Now is definitely the time to slow down as much as possible and savour the last of summer (if you are in the Northern Hemisphere, of course!). I will be revving up for September soon with all kinds of motivating posts on creating new habits and trying out a "sober September" (as defined by YOU - which means you don't have to abstain completely from alcohol if you don't want to... yep, intriguing isn't it!?)

For now, I'm thrilled and slightly sad to share the final installment of the Be More You Video series with you. Thrilled because I love the content and it's been so fun sharing these steps with you, sad that it's coming to an end!

In this final video I talk about Seeking Support, and you'll learn:

  • Why your support team is essential for taking risks and continued growth

  • How to be proactive in seeking the support to show up fully

  • What you can say to people in your life to get the specific support you need

  • And more!

xoxo

by Caitlin Padgett

[Be More You Video 7 of 8] Practicing Radical Honesty

 

Hello,

Happy Monday! How are you doing today?

I'm so excited to share the latest "Be More You" video with you.

The topic of this video, Practicing Radical Honesty, has been one of the most challenging and also liberating for me.

In this video, you'll learn:

  • What is radical honesty and why it's important releasing numbing/addictive behaviours

  • Why we fear telling the truth

  • How to practice radical honesty

  • Where to find support to practice radical honesty

  • And more!

I can't wait to hear what you think about this video. Please know that you can practice radical honesty with me! I mention how you can do this at the end of the video.

xoxo

by Caitlin Padgett

[Be More You Video 6 of 8] Stop shoulding, settling and staying small

 

Hello ,

We're back with the Be More You videos!! And how perfect that the theme of this video is how to Stop Shoulding, Settling and Staying Small.

There were a lot of "shoulds" that came up for me last week, as life collided with many to-dos to get us ready to leave the country, paperwork that needed attending to, an entire apartment that needed to be packed up before we left, a sick assistant, technical problems etc etc. I felt myself spread thin and the "shoulds" started to creep in. Thankfully, I was able to re-record this video and let myself off the hook!

The video covers:

  • How to identify the shoulds and release them

  • How to simplify and create space for YOU to show up

  • How settling may be keeping you small

  • A powerful mantra to create safety to shine

  • And more!

As always, I'd love to hear what you think and what you will be applying this info, or if you even should... (you'll know what I mean when you watch the video ;)

xoxo

by Caitlin Padgett

[Be More You Video 5 of 8] Honouring and Celebrating your femininity

 

Hello and happy Friday!

How has your week been? Today's topic of Embracing, Honoring and Celebrating your Femininity is a super juicy one, which will hopefully be fun for you to dive into over the weekend.

In this video, you'll learn:

  • Why honouring your femininity is so important to showing up fully

  • How to respond to the feeling of being "too much"

  • How not allowing yourself to be truly seen can lead to more numbing

  • How to locate and express your desires

  • And more, of course!

As always, I'd love to hear your thoughts and your DESIRES!! Please send them to me... writing/speaking them out loud helps validate and breathe life into your dreams!

Have a fabulous weekend!
xoxo

by Caitlin Padgett