Programs

Do you find yourself crippled by doubt?

Doubt can creep in many ways.

It may show up as difficulty making a decision, choosing between two options, or purchasing something.

It may show up as a lack of belief in how deserving you are of having your desire fulfilled.

It may even show up as resistance or procrastination.

Underlying doubt that you are capable of something or worth something might throw up unconscious roadblocks and resistance.

You see, doubt likes to be right.

Doubt is attached to the fear-based mind which (to the best of its ability) is trying to keep you safe by keeping you the SAME.

The ego likes to prove itself right - so by creating unconscious resistance to change and setting you up to fail, your ego/fear-based doubt-driven mind can effectively say “See? I TOLD YOU SO. You can’t do this, you aren’t capable, you’re not worthy and you certainly don’t deserve it.”

I see this all the time.

A big part of my work as a coach is to gently shine the line into this shadow that doubt casts.

To create a safe and supportive environment so that my client can start peeling back the layers and understanding what this resistance is really about.

And also, to provide a ton of encouragement and FAITH that a different alternative is possible.

I was reminded of this on Monday while reading the many Martin Luther King Jr quotes floating around the internet in commemoration of the anniversary of his death.

One that really resonated with me and that I shared in our private Facebook community was this one:

“Faith is taking the first step when you don’t see the whole staircase.”

It takes a lot of faith, to give up alcohol or any other unhealthy relationship or dependency that has in many ways served us throughout our lives. It has brought us comfort and soothed pain. It has opened doors and granted permission.

Giving this up for a newer, more integrated, healthier, whole life when you don't exactly know what that looks like yet (or if it's even possible) requires a lot of FAITH.

So many people come to me knowing there is something better for them. However, not having lived this new reality yet - it can be so hard to believe and yes, have faith, that it is possible. That these tough changes, which include confronting some of your deepest, darkest fears about yourself, are worth it. It can be hard to know what life really looks and feels like when the crutch is taken away, the self-medication stops, the liquid courage is removed, the numbness replaced by clarity and presence.

That’s where I am come in - with my own life, with examples of other clients who’ve succeeded in overcoming doubt to make the changes they so desire.

As always, when a theme pops up and resonates with me and I know intuitively that it is what others need to hear at the same time, beautiful synchronicities happen (I call them confirmation that I’m on the right path) and this piece of writing came across my newsfeed yesterday.

“Faith is the “work” in “Light work”.

It scrubs and rinses and steadily erases doubt. Faith stays on doubt's ass: I see you. I dissolve you. I replace you with Faith. And then doubt will pop up again. And Faith is right there: Yep, I heard you. I choose faith. Yep, I know the odds, I choose Faith. And because Faith knows the natural order of things, she says to doubt: You'll probably be back later this week. And you might even distract me. But I’ll still choose Faith. No anger, just clarity. No complaints, just pure, fiery resolve.

Doubt isn’t a failing, it’s a reminder to feed and protect your positive beliefs.

Faith isn’t something you “have”, as much as it's something you do. And if you do it consistently—the clearing, the focusing, the nourishing...the getting back on track, then you become the very Lightness you long for.”

• Danielle LaPorte (click here to read the entire piece)

When you start feeling doubt sinking its paralyzing tentacles into you - stop.

Take a few deeps breaths. If possible, take of your shoes and ground your feet.

Rather than giving it a downward, anxiety riddled spiral of thoughts, focus on the best possible outcome. Breathe life into that vision.

Call a friend or family member who you know can help lift you up again, who can give you a faith-booster.

Meditate or pray.

Diffuse an uplifting blend of essential oils (I love citrus such as wild sweet orange, lemon and grapefruit, rosemary, bergamot, and ylang ylang)

Light candles and incense - do what you can to invite in the Light.

Hold, wear or prominently display moonstone, amethyst or aquamarine crystals, which are said to help find and hold on to faith.

Is this sounding a little “woo woo” to you ? Well, maybe it is, maybe it isn’t. But think about the alternative - staying stuck and weighed down by doubt. If one or all of the techniques above can shift the energy and help you feed and protect your positive beliefs - then why not give it a try?

Edit - I realized, in another flash of insight and synchronicity regarding this topic, that many of you will be receiving this email on the day the new President is sworn into the United States. Now, more than ever, as the personal becomes political, this renewed sense of FAITH that something better is possible might be of critical importance to you.

How can you choose FAITH today ?

What can you do to protect your positive beliefs?

How can you nourish your desire and vision of a different reality for yourself, your community and the world?

What action can you take to support this vision?

I’d love to hear from you! Let me know what you are going to do - TODAY!!

Simply reply to this blog post - I love hearing from you.

Xoxo

Don’t forget!! The Friendship Sale is on for a few days more. One of the most surefire ways of fanning the flames of FAITH is to DO something that sends a beaming message that YES, I DO deserve this!! YES, a transformative experience designed to 100% support my healing and growth is totally possible for me!! YES, I can have a team around me to support me to shine brighter!!

Any questions about the retreat experience? Make sure to email me asap!

“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

The quote has been attributed to Albert Einstein, Mark Twain and Ben Franklin, amongst others. While I do like to properly cite my sources, we’ll just leave this one to the internet debaters and focus on the sentiment of the quote… shall we?

Can you relate?

Maybe you’ve had this experience too.

You want things to be different.
You think things should be different.
You even declare that things WILL be different!

And then nothing changes.

It’s where all the manifestation messaging out there gets confusing. You can’t simply declare to the Universe your desire for a different reality and expect it to be so.

Sure, saying and believing that you are an Abundant person, for example, and then seeking confirmation and signs of abundance can be a powerful exercise in shifting your money blocks or blocks to receiving...however, it’s likely not going to make you a millionaire.

Making things different requires consistent action.

It’s one of the first questions I ask someone when we speak for the first time.
Me: “Have you tried to redefine your relationship to alcohol before?”
The answer is usually yes.
Me: “Great, so what strategies have you tried or what did you do differently?”
Hesitation… “Well, I decided to cut back (or stop) drinking.”
Me: “And what else did you do differently.”
Crickets. “... nothing really.”

And that’s how we end up having the conversation.

So many of us believe that we should somehow be able to “willpower our way” into or out of things…

YES - changing our thoughts IS important. It’s critical in fact. As Dr. Wayne Dyer famously said, “Change your thoughts, change your life.”

BUT - it’s only half the equation.

Intention (ie thought) + action = change.

It’s the only way to change habits and relationships (because our relationship to alcohol IS a relationship) that were years in the making.

You need to do things differently in order for things to be different.

Otherwise, well… it’s kind of like insanity, isn’t it?

So how can YOU do things differently?

What is one thing you can change in your daily routine to start seeing different results?

Sometimes a small change can make a huge difference.

I’ll give you an example.

I recently started feeling in a bit of a rut. It was hard for me to feel inspired to write (and I love writing!) Even though I have a fabulous office, it’s a bit of a drive from my house, and on days that I’m not coaching, I like to be able to work from home. Yet, home felt a bit chaotic. I’d spend time tidying Luna’s toys or washing dishes, or couldn’t get comfortable, and started dreaming up renovations for the house. That was on a good day. On a day when I was more tired, worn out, or generally “blah” feeling, I would feel resentful that more of my wishes weren’t taken into consideration in the design of the downstairs part of my home, that I don’t have a home office, blah blah blah.

Somewhere along the way, I’d forgotten that I have a gorgeous terrace. A terrace where I wrote the MAJORITY OF MY BOOK last year. A terrace with a beautiful breeze in the morning and a stunning view. A terrace that I have to walk across to get from the stairs to my bedroom and back.

How on earth could I have forgotten about this terrace?? Good question, I’ve been asking myself the same thing!!

As I mentioned, I was in a rut (in more ways than one and more on that in a bit).

Making this one change has changed everything. I am happy to be writing again. I’m happier about my house. I feel more energized. I even started working out up here and after an impromptu barre method class I taught a friend last week, we’re going to make it a weekly thing. (Fun fact: I used to be a barre method and fitness teacher)

This seemingly small change has had a huge ripple effect!!

Now, getting to the place of awareness that I needed to change my actions is a slightly longer story.

I was in a rut, as I mentioned. I wasn’t taking care of myself. I came back from Canada exhausted rather than replenished. My expectations of myself and what I was going to accomplish with my business in the past year, coupled with parenting a demanding toddler, had completely depleted me. I  was reaching the point of burn out and I recognized the signs, having been there before.

And yet, I didn’t seem able to “do” anything about it. I was thinking a lot about how I wanted things to be different but I wasn’t taking action. I was consistently deprioritizing myself and my own self-care.

As you and I both know, this is catastrophic for a mother and business owner in the helping profession.

So I took action. I signed up for a 2.5 day “Sensual and Free” retreat in Woodstock, NY.

I must admit, spending $1000 USD for a couple of days seemed steep to me. However, having made investments like this years before - I knew how important it was not only for the content of the retreat but also symbolically. I was sending a powerful message that I’m worth it. That something that is purely and solely centered around MY self-care is as valuable as any business, home or family investment.

During our time at the retreat, we talked and practiced about many things I already “knew.” After all, I’m a holistic coach and any of my clients can attest to the focus and importance I place on self-care, rituals, healthier habits etc.

But I’m still a perfectly imperfect human just like you. Just because I talk about this stuff doesn’t mean it’s always easy for me now.

I needed to be guided for awhile. I needed to get out of my comfort zone. I needed to invest in MYSELF (not my biz, cause I’m really good at doing that).

I needed time away in a sumptuous environment,
to soak a jacuzzi, steam in a sauna, swim naked in the middle of the night in a salt water pool, do a “releasing ceremony” under the full moon,
be in the company of amazing soul sisters 100% committed to my happiness, well-being, and spiritual growth,
eat delicious nourishing food prepared by someone else and with love,
To have the whole bed to myself and sleep diagonally,
To set new intentions,
And of course, to learn to tools and techniques for self-care

That retreat was really only a blip in time over the past year. But those 2.5 days left a big imprint. It’s like a new blueprint for self-love was created and the road map became clearer for me. As you know, I’ve had powerfully transformative retreat experiences in the past. This one was different and I needed it differently because I’m different. I’m at a different place in my life, with a new set of challenges.

Trying to do the same things that worked before and expecting different results was starting to feel, well yes, insane.

Have I nailed self-care in the past 1.5 months since that retreat? Not completely.
However, I feel the fabric of my being is different.
My body remembers how it felt to be there, and craves that kind of loving care.
My mind reminds me more frequently of the desire to sit, to journal, to reaffirm my intentions.
My soul craves more connection with myself, and with other like-minded and like-hearted women.
My spirit is lighter.

And I have new tools for myself and to share with YOU!

My clients and Masterclass participants are already reaping the benefits of my own commitment to self-care, and that makes me happy.

You can bet your bottom dollar (is that actually a saying?) that I will be sharing all of this and so much more next March at Lucir Mexico.

The goal is to create an experience so powerfully transformative that you have no choice to go home a changed person. It will be woven into the fabric of your being. Your soul will remind you of the commitment you made to yourself, your spirit will be dancing for weeks afterwards reminding you of how free you felt, your body will crave nourishment and movement, and your mind, even when throwing up potential resistance, will also display beautiful practicality in reminding you of the tools you learned.

What’s it going to be for you?

Moving your desk, getting up 15 minutes earlier, trying a new class (such as an 8-week salsa dancing class on of my clients is trying out), auditioning for a play (another client who just turned 60 will be performing in a play for the first time next spring - talk about pushing her edge!), or signing up for a powerfully transformative experience - DO SOMETHING!!

As a loving reminder, the early bird discount for Lucir March 2017 ends today. If you email me with questions or are even a “maybe” let me know TODAY and we’ll honour the discount if you need a few more days to get everything together… however, space is limited and we’re already 50% full - so the sooner the better!

Don’t wait until 2017 to make changes, make a commitment to do different, today!

xoxo